Acousticians who say "Ni!"

I don't know why you guys are going on so much and getting all hot under the collar about this dissonance thingee. There is in fact a simple algorithm which returns an objective quantification of the degree of consonance/dissonance, which is completely verifiable and consistent irregardless of:

1. the subjets experience
2. the subjects innate ability
3. the subjects exposure to cultural programming
4. the spectral content
5. the register
6. the duration of tone
7. listening conditions.

Have I missed anything?

For those who would like to apply this algorithm, a copy of it can be found in the collection of the royal library in the Castle of Aaaarrrrgh.

Good luck,

P

Heh!