Letter to A Casual band Leader:

Dear Bandleader:

Re:our daughters wedding, we do want a few requests played if you
don't mind. What my wife and I were thinking was:

Any Keith Jarrett composition from his solo series. Please arrange
for full ensemble and nothing in 4/4 please.

Mahavishnu Orchestra, Dance of the Maya and please have the guitar
player play John Mclaughlin's solo from the live performance Nov. 16,
1972 at Chrysler Arena. My wife and I were at that show and
particularly liked his use of polyrhythms. If you find it too
difficult you can leave out the feedback.

Your choice:
John Coltrane's duets with Pharaoh Sanders. I understand
that their use of atonality is not everyone's cup of tea,
but my guests are usually fond of high register tenor saxes.

We thought a little Stravinsky would be nice. We particularly
like the Rite of Spring. If you want to use the sheet music
it's OK. My husband likes it about1/4 note =93 beats per minute.

Then for the candle lighting ceremony, please learn Frank Zappa's
"The Grand Wazoo." If you want to play it in the original B flat,
that would be OK. And yes, cousin Jeannie does want to sing
the baritone sax solo. Please don't say no, it would hurt
her feelings so.

Finally we have built our own musical instruments (It's kind of a
hobby with us) and we would appreciate if you would use our instruments.
None of them are based upon a 12 tone scale or on common harmonics, but
our 5 year old son tells us it's not really that hard to transpose once
you understand the physics. We would be happy to pay each member an
extra $25 for any inconvenience.

Thank you and don't be late!

Mr. and Mrs. Snovly

That was really funny, David. But where did that come from?

My Dear Mr. and Mrs. Snovly,
We would be delighted to fulfill your request. True, some of our players who
are realy Musicians Union die-hards bawked at having to play in other than
the sacrosanct 12-tet, but a gaggle of their 8- and under kids took up the
idea with enthusiasm.
One suggestion: the Stravinsky seemed a bit commonplace amid the other
pieces. I think a piece by Varese such as "Hyperprism" would work nicely. I
have a MIDI-controlled siren for that purpose, and the sonorities would be
oh! so striking in some temperament other than our usual.
The kids suggested an encore that, I think, would be quite fun. From Karl
Orff's "Music for Children", that blown-out setting of "The Camels are Coming."
Yours truly,
Rollo
At 10:11 AM 12/2/99 -0500, you wrote:
>From: David Beardsley <xouoxno@virtulink.com>
>
>Dear Bandleader:
>
>Re:our daughters wedding, we do want a few requests played if you
>don't mind. What my wife and I were thinking was:
>
>Any Keith Jarrett composition from his solo series. Please arrange
>for full ensemble and nothing in 4/4 please.
>
>Mahavishnu Orchestra, Dance of the Maya and please have the guitar
>player play John Mclaughlin's solo from the live performance Nov. 16,
>1972 at Chrysler Arena. My wife and I were at that show and
>particularly liked his use of polyrhythms. If you find it too
>difficult you can leave out the feedback.
>
>Your choice:
>John Coltrane's duets with Pharaoh Sanders. I understand
>that their use of atonality is not everyone's cup of tea,
>but my guests are usually fond of high register tenor saxes.
>
>We thought a little Stravinsky would be nice. We particularly
>like the Rite of Spring. If you want to use the sheet music
>it's OK. My husband likes it about1/4 note =93 beats per minute.
>
>Then for the candle lighting ceremony, please learn Frank Zappa's
>"The Grand Wazoo." If you want to play it in the original B flat,
>that would be OK. And yes, cousin Jeannie does want to sing
>the baritone sax solo. Please don't say no, it would hurt
>her feelings so.
>
>Finally we have built our own musical instruments (It's kind of a
>hobby with us) and we would appreciate if you would use our instruments.
>None of them are based upon a 12 tone scale or on common harmonics, but
>our 5 year old son tells us it's not really that hard to transpose once
>you understand the physics. We would be happy to pay each member an
>extra $25 for any inconvenience.
>
>Thank you and don't be late!
>
>
> Mr. and Mrs. Snovly
>
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>

"Paul H. Erlich" wrote:

> That was really funny, David. But where did that come from?

I first saw it in the office of one of my customers. He wanted
me to see it because of the home made instruments paragraph.

Whadda hoot!

And then today, on the Avant-Garde list - someone
passed it on from the Dixie-Land list.

Author-less. Who knows who wrote it.

--
* D a v i d B e a r d s l e y
* xouoxno@virtulink.com
*
* 49/32 R a d i o "all microtonal, all the time"
* M E L A v i r t u a l d r e a m house monitor
*
* http://www.virtulink.com/immp/lookhere.htm