How is Everyone Coping?

Some gallows humor from our urban front lines. I particulary liked
the line about Grade B Iraqui anthrax, since we had already pretty
much said the same here.

Peace,
Mary

Adapting to a New Way of Living
>
> By Joel Achenbach
> Washington Post Staff Writer
> Wednesday, October 17, 2001; 12:55 PM
>
> Turning on the news lately or glancing at the morning paper is
about as
> entertaining as renting "Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives."
It's a
> relentless, nauseating horror show, day after day.
>
> The other morning I was watching TV when a friend walked by and
asked,
> "What's the latest?"
>
> "Death," I said. "Terror. War. Unresolvable global hatred and
violence and
> misery."
>
> My friend said, "So nothing's new."
>
> These days we check the news to find out if anyone's come up with a
novel
> way
> to kill us. It's always reassuring to know that we are still being
> terrorized in familiar ways -- the conventional unconventional
attacks.
> Anthrax? Suddenly it's just another part of daily American life.
>
> We adapt and move on. This is what humans do -- we are the
hyperadaptable
> species that lives from pole to pole, from mountaintops to dense
jungles. We
> are technological creatures who venture to the bottom of ocean
trenches, hop
> around on the moon and orbit the Earth so routinely that people on
the
> ground forget that anyone's up there. We can overcome this present
reign of
> terror. We've been through worse than this -- possibly.
>
> When we get on an airplane now we simply incorporate into our
routine a
> mental checklist for how we will subdue anyone who tries to fly the
plane
> into a building. You make sure your seat is in its full and upright
> position, buckle your seatbelt, secure your tray table and look for
objects
> you can hurl at a hijacker.
>
> (Is all this too, you know, flip? Then read something else! I
assure you
> that
> everything else on the Web site is sufficiently dire and horrifying.
> Someone's got to do the Terror Humor.)
>
> Yesterday at my office there was an anthrax scare and the building
was
> quickly surrounded by fire trucks and hazardous materials vans and
hooded
> guys in orange jumpsuits. Naturally our supervisors passed word
that there
> was nothing to worry about. Why get worried just because the
building is
> being cordoned off with police crime-scene tape and some folks are
here
> looking for the Andromeda Strain? We went about our business. I
kept
> telling myself, "Don't worry, even if it's anthrax, it's probably
one of
> the less lethal strains."
>
> The modern urban person wards off evils through the adoption of
expertise.
> Any day now we'll have memorized the various anthrax brand names,
the grades
> of quality, the milling techniques and grain sizes. We'll find
ourselves
> saying things like, "Don't worry, that Iraqi B-grade doesn't
aerosolize too
> easily."
>
> For weeks now a friend who works in the Senate has been worried
that the
> Capitol is a target. I've tried to be reassuring. In all
probability, I
> said,
> things will be fine. I think we can all agree that the arrival of an
> envelope of military-grade anthrax and the exposure of more than 30
staffers
> does not meet the definition of things being "fine." That's SO not
fine. My
> friend told me, "I'd get the nostril swab test but the line is
about 500
> people long." We discussed whether he might find a way to skip to
the front
> of the line. In Washington, cutting to the front of the anthrax
test line is
> what we now refer to as "one of life's little pleasures."
>
> Today's news features more details about the attack on Afghanistan.
There's
> a
> cheery situation. The place has already been cratered by two
decades of war;
> millions of people face starvation. No one believes this particular
military
> operation will solve the problem of terrorism. It might not even
REDUCE the
> problem of terrorism. It will only guarantee -- hopefully -- that
certain
> terrorists go from the Most Wanted list to the Most Deceased list.
>
> Bin Laden, for all we know, is sitting in a cafe in Amsterdam. His
> terrorists
> may have long since wandered off into Pakistan or some other such
place,
> disguised as ordinary fellows who are "between jobs." If they make
an
> offhand
> remark that indicates a virulent hatred of America that'll just
help them
> blend in with the crowd.
>
> The other day I was hiking in the woods, which are gloriously
colorful right
> now, and I wondered if the terrorists have ever, even for a moment,
paused
> to
> enjoy the beauty of nature, the miracle of life on Earth. A recent
statement
> by an al Qaeda spokesman comes to mind: "There are thousands of
young people
> who look forward to death like the Americans look forward to life."
My guess
> is that this guy's not interested in joining the Sierra Club.
>
> Every few days we hear of some new and disturbing manifestation of
terror. I
> spoke yesterday -- true story -- to a former public official who
said that
> it
> might be possible for Osama bin Laden and his network to obtain a
nuclear
> weapon in Pakistan, which possesses nukes and is not exactly a
stable
> nation. He also talked about the possibility that bioterrorism
could kill
> one third of the planet's population. After I hung up I went to
lunch and
> had the usual, a turkey sandwich. This is life now: You contemplate
> unspeakable, insane, apocalyptic horror, then you go get your turkey
> sandwich.
>
> Today I'm miffed at Stephen Hawking, the famous physicist. He has
decided to
> offer up the helpful observation that unless we colonize some other
planet
> we
> will likely become extinct in a matter of centuries.
>
> "I don't think the human race will survive the next thousand years
unless we
> spread into space. There are too many accidents that can befall
life on a
> single planet," Hawking told Britain's Daily Telegraph newspaper.
>
> He's worried about exotic biological weapons, reportedly.
>
> "Nuclear weapons need large facilities, but genetic engineering can
be done
> in a small lab. You can't regulate every lab in the world."
>
> This is just what we need: For the world's smartest man to raise the
> possibility that EVERYONE on Earth will die. His "solution" to the
problem
> is
> space travel. That way, down the road, someone could say, "On
Earth, six
> billion people died, but, on the brighter side, some humans
survived on
> Neptune."
>
> I'm not against going to another world. But is it okay with
everyone if I
> cling to my perhaps naive belief that there's still some hope for
this one?
>
> © 2001 The Washington Post Company
>
>
>

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